Failing

         Samantha didn’t know what to do.  She had excelled so well in her last position with the company and now that they had promoted her to CEO, she was failing miserably. 

         Her home life was starting to deteriorate as a result.  She would lash out at her children for the simplest things.  She hadn’t had sex with her husband in over 6 months.  She didn’t have time for anything, except to work.

         How long can I keep this up before they fire me?

         Samantha knew she needed help, but she couldn’t bring herself to ask for it.  I can do this.  I don’t need anyone’s help.  They expect me to do this on my own.  She kept telling herself these things over and over again.  Why was she so scared to admit she couldn’t do the job?  Was this role even what she wanted to do?  She didn’t ask to be promoted.  How could they do this to me?

         Her health started to fail as well.  Her mental condition was actually having an effect on her physical body.  She looked sickly, clothes hanging off her frail frame, pale skin color, bags under her eyes from lack of sleep.  No amount of makeup helped.

         This was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and she was blowing it.  How was she going to recover?  She would have to move away, change jobs.  She couldn’t stomach the idea of everyone being disappointed in her inability to succeed.  Her father was right, she would never amount to anything.

         Samantha sat at her desk staring blankly at her computer screen, deep in thought.

         “Hey, Sam,” said the President of the company. 

         Samantha jumped out of her seat, her mind free from her torment for a brief moment.

         “Oh, hey Dick,” Samantha said.  “Sorry, you startled me.”

         Dick smiled.  “Sorry about that Sam.  You got a minute?”

         “Uh, sure,” she stammered. 

         “Great.  Let’s convene in my office.”

         Samantha grabbed a legal pad and pen and followed Dick to this office.

         This is it.  It’s over.  My father wins again.  She had knots in her stomach and felt like she was going to be sick.

         “Sam, please, sit down,” Dick said.  “So, how are you holding up?”

         Samantha sat frozen, she wasn’t sure how to respond.

         “Look, Sam, we all know this is a new role for you.  We gave you this opportunity because we have faith in you.  We believe you have what it takes to be a successful CEO.  We don’t expect you to know how to do everything now, but we do expect you to try to learn.  What’s holding you back?”

         “I, I don’t know.  I feel like I’m trying so hard to do a great job, but I’m failing at everything I’m doing.  I can’t get out of my own head.  I haven’t spent hardly any time with my children.  I think my husband is having an affair.  I can’t sleep.  I don’t know what to do.” 

         Tears began to well up in her eyes.

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